Nobody is immune to emotional baggage but very caring about someone brings it out to the forefront in the form of questionable feelings-driven responses. Identifying which behavior is bad and which is good, and responding accordingly, is the only thing you can do.
It is possible that some toxic habits could be mistaken for healthy responses, even when you are able to recognize positive behaviors. Can you think of any? Here are some of them!
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7 Toxic Relationship Habits That Seem Perfectly Normal
1. Dropping Hints
A way to communicate your feelings without saying them outright. Ugh, dropping hints. Although it might seem like a harmless way to avoid conflict, dropping hints is not a healthy habit for relationships. Additionally, it can be highly manipulative as well as passive-aggressive.
As the name implies, it has to do with your partner making sense of your feelings or what you want without you having to open up and tell them. It is not healthy to drop hints in a relationship. Instead, try to be open and honest in your communication.
2. Holding Your Partner Responsible for How You Feel
Giving and taking in relationships requires a lot of communication about what you need and don’t need. The more comfortable you become with someone, the more difficult it is to distinguish between behaviors that must be changed for your relationship and normal actions that irritate you.
After a long day, you might want to cuddle with your S.O., but they already have plans to meet up with friends. In reality, your day was just difficult and you needed some time to recover.
A bad day makes you feel annoyed and upset because they don’t take the time to speak with you. You are the only one who is responsible for your emotions at the end of the day.
If you blame your partner for your feelings, you will only end up with a lot of anger and bitterness, which will end up ruining your relationship.
3. Jealousy
In general, there is an idea that some jealousy is good for a relationship. This simply means your partner cares or wants to keep you. Because human beings are flawed, jealousy isn’t healthy in any relationship.
Insecurity, doubt, or insecurity at work all contribute to jealousy.
It is reasonable to assume that jealousy is a healthy aspect of your relationship, but since insecurities will always exist, managing your jealousy is all you can do to make sure it doesn’t get out of control.
4. Never Fighting
Conflict is hard, but it’s also necessary—especially in a romantic relationship. Conflict allows you to learn new things about your partner and see if you can make it through some rough patches, which are bound to happen in any romance.
While never fighting might seem to indicate that you’re just totally on the same page all the time, it’s actually more than likely a sign that you’re both swallowing how you really feel for the sake of avoiding conflict.
Not only does it keep you from being honest with yourself and your partner, but it also stops you from discovering how your partner reacts when something bothers them, which is usually when their true colors start to show.
5. Threatening a Breakup
As unfortunate as it is, we’ve all been in a fight with our partners and stated “l can’t do it anymore” or “we should probably part ways.” Of course, a breakup is always possible, but using it as a threat to your partner is very unhealthy.
It’s basically the equivalent of emotional blackmail, causing your partner to freak out and do their best to end the conflict by any means necessary.
Relationships are full of disagreements and tough times, and you and your SO are no exception. Talking through them should not mean the end of your relationship. When you use a breakup as a threat to keep your partner on your good side, your relationship becomes a bartering tool.
A toxic, unfair, and manipulative behavior is being displayed here.
6. Thinking They ‘Complete’ You
The most famous line in every romance movie is “You complete me.” Finding someone who can smooth out your rough edges and solve all of your emotional problems is a romantic idea, isn’t it?
You’re wrong! You are not complete on your own; you need your partner to make you whole, or you are looking for someone to complete you. Thus, you’ll never be able to deal with your own shortcomings or work through your issues without enabling your partner to be your emotional crutch too.
Before you can align yourself with someone else, you must be enough on your own. A relationship with an unfair power balance would result if you are always dependent on your partner.
There is no possibility of a lasting relationship if both parties don’t feel equal, and neither of you needs someone else. You shouldn’t think that way because it’s unhealthy and toxic.
7. Constant Communication
Being able to stay in contact with people in the digital age is powerful, but you can literally contact your partner at any time with so many avenues to do so. There is nothing stopping you from talking to your significant other on social media, FaceTime, or texting. Many people are on social media every second of the day.
Staying in touch all the time with your partner doesn’t seem like a bad thing at first, but it’s actually a pretty toxic habit.
By allowing both of you to keep tabs on your partner all the time, you don’t have the opportunity to breathe or live your own lives outside of each other, and you ruin the development of your relationship by giving each of you no space to breathe.
A healthy relationship depends on the healthy development of your relationship, so being apart isn’t just a way to remind yourself to be your own person.
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