It might be enough to rev the engine on some days just to glance at a picture of your celebrity crush. It may not come naturally to some to get into the mood. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Despite your lack of sauciness right now, you should not give up on the idea of getting into the mood. In reality, it’s all about taking control of the situation and focusing on the things that you can influence.

While libido naturally fluctuates, you can definitely boost it when you feel a little down. You’ll know the right thing (or things) to do when you find them. A powerful tool is a mind, Brandon says. It can make you turn off sex, or it can make you turn on for sex.”

Those ready to heat things up should get their heads in the game. The sex experts list all of the tips they’ll need to turn themselves on and get back to sexy.

1. Turn up the volume on sexy stories.

When it comes to porn, visuals are most common, but audio stories shouldn’t be ignored either. The renowned somatic psychotherapist and certified sex therapist Holly Richmond recommends apps such as Dipsea, which offer sexy stories that are short and easy to consume. 

Quinn, Literotica, and Tumblr are all sites where the audience can publish their steamiest tales if you’re in the mood for some fan fiction.

2. Get touchy.

You can get hot from holding on to textures, says Richmond. Lie in your softest sheets, close your eyes and run your fingers over a blanket, or find a leather jacket in your hands to get you going.

Depending on the stimulus, desire can come on in a range of ways, so get handsy until you feel your body react—maybe your nipples will feel hard or your stomach will flutter.

3. Do some breathwork.

By breathing in the same manner you do when you’re turned on, you can recreate the same sensations that occur during sex or when someone is touching you sensually.

Kegels are recommended as a companion to breathing exercises. When you breathe in, pull up your pelvic floor and perform Kegels; when you breathe out, let go of your pelvic floor. As Richmond points out, it is not uncommon to orgasm simply by breathing if you get really into it.

4. Send a sext or two.

You can easily write a sext even if there is no one you can send it to. Let’s get something steamy in there. A few hot selfies and typing your fantasies on the computer can set you in the mood.

Alternatively, Richmond suggests that you reread old sexts you’ve already read that are known to work.

5. Swipe through photos that get you going.

Can’t quite recall the last time you had sex on the beach or that hot fling in the car? Richmond says you should check out the photos.

Even with a generic photo of the beach or a car, you’ll be transported back in time to a time when you were awake. Take a sexy photo (or ten) and flip through them to see what your libido was like.

6. Take pleasure class.

School is something you can do at any age. When the class is about pleasure and sex, how could you not want to attend?

In addition to teaching a course on mindful sex for sex toy brand Dame, Richmond suggests that you search for the many other virtual courses available and you’ll find everything from squirting to pleasure mechanics to developing a deeper emotional connection with your partner.

Visit your local sex shop if you prefer face-to-face encounters. Richmond says many sex toy outlets offer training to their clients.

7. Give yourself a massage.

Getting handsy can be a hassle if you aren’t in the mood, but you should try anyway. You can massage your legs and feet with essential oils or your favorite lotion, according to Richmond.

The moment you are touched, you may close your eyes and envision that you are being touched by someone who matters to you.

8. Light some candles.

To feel turned on, Richmond emphasizes the importance of drawing on the senses. You communicate your mood to your mind by doing this. As far as visuals and scents are concerned, Richmond recommends candles.

As a bonus, they offer that sexy ambiance you’re after yet also keep you hot and bothered while you play with some wax. Ensure the candle is play-safe!

9. Listen to sensual music.

Play sexy songs on your playlist. You might also add a little jazz into the equation, or use your usual sex playlist to get in the mood. To replay, just hit the replay button.

10. Up the romance with food.

Chocolate-covered strawberries or a cheeseburger similar to the one you’d have while out on a date might do the trick for playing on your sense of taste.

Once you find the dish or snack that gets you going, you’ll no longer be lost when it comes to feeling turned on. “Everyone’s sexual template is different, and going through that desire arousal with the five senses offers so much knowledge.”

11. Eat in a sensual way.

If you get a kick out of eating oysters, go for it. Rather than the food, Brandon stresses the importance of eating it the right way. When eating with your hands, what will happen?

Is your hand covered in chocolate sauce? The suggestion is made by her. Get your tongue involved (and savor the chocolate

12. Reminisce about sexy past experiences.

If you need to boost your libido, you probably remember at least one unforgettable escapade. It can also help spark your body and get your mind in the game if you let your mind drift there.

Reminiscing can be a surefire way to rev your engine whether you as a couple romped in a park, or just hit the hay as silk sheets played sensual songs.

Quick Links

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Hope you try all these ways and let us know which one worked for you in the comments section below.